I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I smell like Dick and happiness
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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