Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
