I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
