I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
