i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
