Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Randomize
