her vagine was all disorganized.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Just high enough for therapy.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
