I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
