if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
