butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
