I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Randomize
