Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
