i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
