I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
