thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
