you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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