so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
