There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
