I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
