You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
A bitchslap is in order.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
