..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
