For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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