I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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