never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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