Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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