I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
