I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
