A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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