And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
