If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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