My hair reeks of homosexuality.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
