That's intense
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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