hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
