May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
