I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
