I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
