When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Do vagina's smell?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
