This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize