Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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