DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
