why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize