Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
