Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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