So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
