dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
