How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
