what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Randomize
