he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
