Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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