he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
